Depression and dependency on civilization

I don’t know how involved I’ll be able to get here because I feel lousy and apathetic for some reason.

But some of that reason may ironically be what I want to write this post about.

Depression. Does modern civilization cause it? Is any of it in our heads? And what can be done.

It seems like the numbers for cases of depression/anxiety disorders and those prescribed to anti-depressants for these disorders is on the rise every year.

Well, I’m on anti-depressants (how about that, Tom Cruise!) And if it wasn’t for them, I might not be alive. I was really bad. Not sure why. And it just made me more angry that I could never properly define to myself the cause of my feelings.

But then I recently had a son (my first!), and got married before that. Both of those things gave my life so much purpose.

However, depression is a daily fight. I have to battle anxiousness, being overwhelmed/frustrated with too many things I feel like I need to do or are not doing, and things of a similar nature.

I know I don’t get enough exercise and eat right, either. That’s some of it right there, as well.

What I do try and do now is immerse myself in things I enjoy. Defining those things is some of the difficult part. That’s what writing this is about, and it’s been a great venting spot lately.

But back to my anti-depressant use. It’s Lexapro (Escitalopram), people. It freaking WORKS for me, like a charm. It took going through a lot of medications, too. Some people can get by without medication – I tried for YEARS and it wasn’t working – nothing was. So I climbed on the Lexapro train.

All aboard.

The insane thing about Lexapro is its’ side effects – especially at first. It destroyed my sex drive (which came back!) It also has horrible withdrawal feelings, crawly skin, restlessness, anxiousness, sheer insanity, etc.

So, in this way I am currently dependent on civilization. Weird, right? I don’t really relish this fact, due to my constant and ongoing cynicism of the benefits/productivity of civilization. So this is a dilemma.

But here again, my interests sustain me.

I was excited recently about all the happenings/findings that have been going on in outer space research (more about that soon, in a separate post – maybe the next one?), and other things of the like.

I just have to wonder if it is the effect of modern civilization that we ARE depressed, so dependent on strange chemicals, etc. I read this great post at The Art of Manliness that posed the question of whether or not the suburbs (read : civilization) kills our manhood.

Could I go out and get food for my family, without supermarkets – as in hunting, fishing, and gathering again, as humans once did?

I’m sure you do what you have to do in a given situation.

I was a vegetarian for a while, too, but then these crazy canine teeth wanted more meat, and here I am.

My friend and I had a discussion about the strange predicament/paradox which is the current status of the ability to totally sustain oneself outside of our current civilization/system – hey, we have imposed hunting and fishing “limits” on what we can hunt, fish, kill, (thank Earth for) and then take home to skin and eat.

But that discussion is for another time also.

Would love to hear everyone’s thoughts on this the effects of the Spectacle (see previous post/s) and your own personal experiences fighting the life-fucking demons of depression.